everythings coming up milhouse

We have decided to start a new feature at ECUM. We are hoping it becomes at least a weekly deal. There are so many things that we write about and don’t agree with the other person on so we decided to debate some of the topics we disagree on. We are calling it Crossfire and this is our first installment.

1. Manny Ramirez showing up the Cleveland Indians after his homerun Tuesday night against the Cleveland Indians.

Everyone Is On Steroids:
I think it was completely ridiculous that Manny stood in the batters box until his homerun landed in the bullpen or maybe he is still standing there. Hey Manny! Was this the first homerun you ever hit? Do you know the score? You team is still losing by 4 runs. The game is not over but your playoff hopes may be. The longer you stand there the more you upset the obviously better team and fuel the fire to run the Sox out of the playoffs. Enjoy the disappointment of being on the best team that underperformed and is on their way to a bittersweet off-season. At least it will be bittersweet to those that care about the team more than themselves. I understood it when you did the exact same thing when you hit the walk off homerun against the Angels. That’s different – it was a big moment and you should be able to enjoy it. I hope that when the Red Sox are down to one of their final outs you get one in your back. I don’t wish any physical harm or an injury on you but you need to pay for that bullshit. I hope you stood there long enough to realize that you were obviously celebrating something you did and not your team and that you were there long enough to prove it to anyone that knows baseball that all you care about is yourself. But, I think you proved that a long time ago with your phantom injuries when you don’t want to play and the numerous trades you have demanded. Its just Manny being Manny an asshole.

Hardaway Hates You:

Lord. God forbid someone show some style and personality on a baseball field. Its not like he hit the homer to make the score 12-1; it was the third of back-to-back-to-back home runs, the first time that had been done in ALCS history. It made the score 7-3 with no outs in the top of the 6th inning. Manny hit the ball hard enough so that there was no doubt that it was leaving the premises. I could see if it scraped the left field wall, and his preening might have cost his team a base or a run. But he hit this bad boy about 430 feet. And while some might argue that all that standing around does is get the other team pumped, one could also argue that his admiration of the shot could have invigorated his own team. After he does that to cut the lead to four, maybe it gives his team a bit of a confidence boost. Who knows? I do know that I’ll take Manny doing that in the playoffs over a quiet guy who hits his homers and just jogs around the bases who is now sitting at home.

2. Who is the worst team in football? Miami Dolphins vs. St. Louis Rams

Everyone Is On Steroids:

The St. Louis Rams, period. The Rams are underperforming, injury plagued, don’t know how to draft or do anything in free agency and they getting out coached every game. Its easy to blame their bad season on injuries but every team has injuries and have to get through them. Did you see that the Rams are averaging 12 points per game? 12 points!! They have scored 6 touchdowns in 6 games. It doesn’t get much worse than that. The Dolphins have scored more than twice as many touchdowns with 13. Ronnie Brown alone has scored one less than the Rams as a team. The Dolphins are ranked higher in all offensive categories. Overall the Rams are 29th and the Dolphins are 21st. In passing the woeful Dolphins are ranked 8 places behind them and the Dolphins can run better too and are ranked 7 places higher. The same people that make Rams fans scratch their heads every April on draft day like to do the same in free agency. Check out the top 6 picks of the last three years – I’ll put their positions because you probably haven heard of them since: Alex Baron (OT), Ron Bartell (CB), Tye Hill (CB), Joe Klopfenstein (TE), Adam Carriker (DE) and Brian Leonard (RB). There can not be that many busts in the NFL instead of poor player evaluations. These are the same people that have signed the biggest bust in the NFL for 2007 – Drew Bennett. Even if they get the number one pick after this season – they will pick some decent college player but a shitty NFL player. The same management that couldn’t get along with a winner in Mike Martz got a perfect ‘Yes Sir’ guy with Linnehan. At least Martz gave them a shot at winning. Linehan doesn’t seem to know when to go for it on fourth down, score in the red zone, when to admit you have lost a game and not trying to kill your quarterback, control his team, make them respect him or win 1 f’n game!!

Hardaway Hates You:

I am not going to try to argue that the team the Rams put out there in Week 6 isn’t worse than the Dolphins; obviously, they are. But I’m not going to call the Rams the worst team in football because half their team is injured. Any team that relies heavily on their offense needs solid play from its quarterback and running back. When those two players get hurt, the team has no chance. This is what happened to the Rams. Defensively, they are not that bad. But if you’re going to start any team’s number two quarterback and number two running back behind a patchwork offensive line, that team is going to get stomped. But when healthy, the Rams are definitely better than Miami. The Dolphins started with Trent Green at quarterback. Ronnie Brown is the Fish’s only bright spot. And with the trade of Chris Chambers to San Diego, the Dolphins’ number one receiver is now Marty Booker. A guy who had under 30 catches last year. When both teams are healthy, the Rams are infinitely better. Right now, Miami is only dealing with one major injury to their key players, and one could argue that Cleo Lemon is better than Green. With all that health, they’re 0-6. The Rams would be at least 2-4 if Bulger and Jackson were healthy.

3. Is Brian Urlacher overrated?

Everyone Is On Steroids:

Yes, plain and simple but that picture still shows he is the man. He is the face and leader of the Chicago Bears Defense and they are overrated. So obviously, he is overrated. He is not even the best linebacker on the Bears. It’s easy to see Lance Briggs holds that title – speaking of titles – perhaps he should have taken his out of his lamborghini after he crashed it and called it in stolen. But anyways, back to Urlacher. Either his ‘overall soreness’ is worse than anyone is letting on or he is aging very quickly and right before our eyes. Week one he was still 29 but he has aged about 2 years with each game this year. He is not as fast from sideline to sideline as he was in years past and isn’t wrapping up players as easily as he was before. Somehow though, I will watch a game and see him in on about 7 or 8 tackles but after the coaches review the game and the stats come out on Tuesday some miracle has occured and his number has climbed to 16. Seriously, try it this week – its really quite amazing. Lance Briggs has been credited with 42 of his 45 tackles as being solo – you cant really fudge on those but Urlacher only has 33 of his 42 tackles as being solo. That is no number to laugh at but he is clearly not as good as he is made out to be. If a quarterback had the greatest arm and aim but had a completion percentage below 50% while the offense struggles and never scores - he would be called overrated. Therefore, if Brian Urlacher is next in the long line of Chicago hall of fame linebackers and the Lions scored 34 points (NFL record) in one quarter and Adrian Peterson runs for 224 yards in one game its obvious the Middle Linebacker is missing something. O-VER RATE-ED! Come on chant with me – its easier once you admit it. O-VER RATE-ED! BRI-AN UR-LACH-ER!

Hardaway Hates You:

2005–122 tackles, 6 sacks. 2006–144 tackles. Sure, 2007 isn’t off to the best of starts, but the entire Bears defense is banged up and not playing well. Many Urlacher detractors say that since he doesn’t have a lot of sacks, it shows he isn’t that good. What it really shows is that those people don’t realize that its not Urlacher’s job to rush the passer in Lovie Smith’s cover two defense. But the question of being overrated comes down to this: Would I want another middle linebacker on the Bears ahead of Urlacher? Let’s go down the list of prominent middle backers in the NFL: Zach Thomas? No way. Keith Brooking? He’s just a slower, smaller Urlacher. Ray Lewis? 2, 3, 4 years ago–definitely. But right now, Lewis is arguably only the second best LB on his own team (Bart Scott, outside linebacker). So if I can’t come up with anyone who is difinitively better at his position, how can Urlacher be overrated?

4. Is the BCS is better or worse for having Univ. of Southern Florida as the No. 2 team?

Everyone Is On Steroids:

Better. All I ever hear is that the BCS is bad and they need a playoff because not everyone has a fair shot. Now that USF is in there its still flawed because other teams that have lost should be there because they are ‘better.’ How does that make sense? This is the exact randomness that could be expected from a playoff system. Anyone can make it and anyone can win. However, with a playoff system do you really want games at the beginning or end of a season that don’t mean as much and are no fun to watch. Backups playing in place of the stars and lesser teams winning (thus getting them in the playoffs) because the bigger team has already ensured their spot and ranking in a playoff. That only means boring regular season games and boring playoff games when less deserving teams make it in. USF being number two is not very glorious because people wanna hate the BCS and the fun argument is that the system sucks but offer no good solution except a playoff. Teams have to be on their toes week one and on. Many teams like to soften their schedule at the beginning of the year so this doesn’t happen but this still exposes the frauds. 2007 is the perfect example of this. I hope USF (or some other unknown) plays for the title soon – hell a USF vs. Hawaii game would be just fine by me – just cause they aren’t the biggest schools doesn’t mean they shouldn’t make it. if USC wanted to play for the title they shouldn’t have lost to Stanford, If Michigan wanted to play its too bad they couldn’t beat a 1AA team. The list could go on and on. This is the same thing that could happen in a playoff but it’s happening in the regular season and every game still means something. People need to remember that even though it’s a huge million or billion dollar industry – the ones actually playing the game are not supposed to be getting paid. Asking them to do more and further risk injury to their lives or careers just isn’t right. Go Bulls!!!

Hardaway Hates You:

Its obviously worse. The BCS fucking blows. I love that South Florida is currently the number two team in the BCS, they could win the rest of their games, but because of a convaluded system a one-loss team could still get in to the championship game ahead of them. So basically, the Bulls are not in charge of their own destiny. So whats the point here? BCS backers say that a playoff would kill the intrigue of the college football season where every game is like an elimination, one loss and you’re done playoff tree. Well, if USF goes 11-0, beats West Virginia, Rutgers, Louisville, and others en route to a perfect season, and LSU or Oklahoma get in ahead of the Bulls, whats the point of the whole ‘every week is a playoff argument’? Lets say the Bulls lose, and then there is 7 or 8 one loss teams–who’s to say who deserves a chance at the title? Only in college football would the title continue to be decided by writer’s votes and a computer, and people would say that’s fair.

5. Should the NHL just give it up and quit?

Everyone Is On Steroids:

HELL NO!! Just because its not as popular as the big 3? Tell me you have a better reason than that. Take this for example, how many people do you know? How many of the people you know are idiots? I willing to bet that more than 3/4s of the people you know are idiots. So the majority of people out there are idiots – do you really wanna do something just cause everyone else is? Hockey is one of the most athletic games around. Imagine playing golf on ice skates while someone is coming at you full steam to knock you over before you can even tee up the ball. Then if you ever do get a shot off there is some asshole standing in front of the hole with an even bigger stick knocking it away or just jumping on it before can even get close. Sounds pretty difficult doesn’t it? I wasn’t much of a fan before living in Michigan for a few years and really learning about the sport. College hockey is still better but NHL is coming around its getting faster and they need to do away with the shootout. It took something that was the most dramatic part of a game and turned it into everyday occurance. They are trying to appeal to an audience that wont like it anyway so they should cater to their fans and aim to be more like college and Olympic hockey with faster play (they don’t need big players and trying to create NFL on skates), smaller rinks and automatic icing.

Hardaway Hates You:

Back in the late 80s and early 90s, the Blackhawks were a really good team and I loved following the squad. 15 years later, I would rather watch football, baseball, basketball, boxing, golf, college basketball, college football, and college baseball over hockey. So that means hockey is somewhere around 10th on my TV sports wish list. And I’m not alone here. The league’s TV contract is with the Versus Network, whatever the hell that is. Outside of newcomer Sidney Crosby, there aren’t any NHL stars kids can look to and emulate. Maybe hockey shouldn’t just fold up shop entirely; Canadians and Russians still love it. But here in America, until the NHL eliminates about 6 teams in markets who don’t care, thus elevating the quality of play–there won’t be interest in the sport. And its a shame, because there is not many things in sports more exciting than playoff hockey.

My Rebuttal

In response to Hardaway Hates You’s prediction for the LCS I will offer the readers the accurate prediction.

Let me start in the American League. I believe Cleveland is the better team on the field. I agree with the thought that this is a great matchup. Both teams have some extremely talented pitchers. Game one is absolutely ridiculous!! Sabathia vs. Beckett is great theatre just waiting to happen. Both have a great shot at winning the CY Young.  The Indians already have Francona a little worried about their multi-million dollar rookie. I don’t blame them for moving Daiskue after lasting 4.2 innings and giving up 3 Earned Runs and 7 hits. I know its odd to say this about a guy that once pitched a 17 inning game and more than 250 pitches in high school but I think his shoulder is getting a little tired. He had to be moved around a little at the end of the season to try and prevent this and I just don’t think it worked. I think he will lose in game 3 because of this. Look for Sabathia to pitch a good game but lose tonight. However, the Indians will win the next games with the youth of Carmona beating the age of Schilling. Then a ho-hum game by Daiskue will leave the door open for the Indians to go up 2-1. No one believed Byrd could do it against the Yankees and he could be up to the task of taking Cleveland to a 3-1 lead against Wakefield but even if he doesn’t I think Sabathia or Carmona are up to the task of securing this series for Cleveland. I just don’t think the Indians have been given the respect they deserve. Borowski makes it interesting but its obvious he has gotten the job done at least 45 times this season. As far I can tell he only gave up one homerun to the Yankees but I guess that’s one too many. He will make the series interesting by letting runners on but the Indians will still represent the AL this year. Cleveland wins in 6 games even if it doesn’t follow this map.

How can anyone go against the Rockies? They have won 17 of their last 18 and have been fighting for their season for a while. Pressure hasn’t gotten to them before and it wont start now. Everything has been falling in to place for them since Holliday did or did not touch the plate. Arizona looked good against the Cubs but their bats fell asleep more than their pitching did. Webb is a stud and will continue being that way but Hernandez didn’t look sharp in game 3 – it seemed he had 2 men on base in every inning. The Cubs just couldn’t do anything but hit into double plays. Stats can be found to back up any fact. Did you know that 78% of all facts are made up? Now you do. The Rockies score more runs and have more fun playing and will win the NLCS and make their first trip to the World Series.

So now you have both of our opinions and that means its gotta be a Boston – Colorado series.

I really think that every game will be extremely good to watch because the teams matchup pretty good against each other.

Please wait at least 10 seconds after reading this before  calling me an idiot – but then feel free to let me have it.

I did somewhat well in my predictions for the Division series. Of the teams I picked to advance, only the Cubs failed to make it to baeball’s final four. And with all honesty, my first reaction was that the D-Backs would beat them, but I was swayed by all the pro-Cub talk here in Chicago. I should of known better.

So here is my preview of the two league championship series. Lets start with the American League.

Boston-Cleveland: This matchup isn’t getting the publicity it should, shockingly. I think its the best ALCS matchup since the Yankees-Red Sox series in 2003 and 2004. I sense that the Red Sox fans, unlike the Yankees fans, truly respect and fear what the Indians are capable of. They might be the only team in the league that can match the starting pitching the Red Sox throw out there.

But the Indians’ problem in this series lies at the end of the bullpen. There will be at least one or two games in this best of seven which will come down to the late inning pitching, and while the Indians have great 7th and 8th inning guys, their closer is absolutely atrocious. One of the biggest baseball questions of 2007 has to be how Joe Borowski, with an ERA over 5, had 45 saves. Game 4 against the Yankees was a perfect example. Joe came in with a four run lead, gave up two bombs and held on for a 6-4 win.

Meanwhile, the Red Sox throw Jonathan Papelbon out there in the ninth, a guy who was absolutely unhittable until August and is still one of the three or four best closers in the game. Consdering how good of clutch hitters the Red Sox are, I highly doubt the Indians will be able to hold one run leads in the ninth. And obviously, thats huge. These teams, outside of their closers, are relatively evenly matched….so Cleveland needs to pull out every close game they can. And I think anything less than a two-run lead in the ninth is flimsy for the Tribe.

Therefore I’m going to pick Boston in 7. I really, really want Cleveland to win. Imagine being an Indians fan right now: your team hasn’t won since 1948, and you might be able to beat New York and Boston en route to the World Series. Talk about icing on the cake. Even a fan of the rival White Sox is envious of that possibility. But I think Beckett and Sabathia will cancel each other out, and while Carmona is better than Schilling, Curt takes him game to another level in the playoffs. Plus, I think Borawski will blow a Carmona game, if Fausto isn’t able to go the distance. Look for Boston to win two games off the Indian bullpen and hold off the Tribe in a great series.

Arizona-Colorado: Let me first say I think its horrible there are still thousands of seats available for this series in Phoenix. Your team won a title in 2001, they have a great young team and a solid chance at winning another, and you can’t sell out a 45,000 seat stadium? That’s fucking horseshit. Lets contract Florida, Tampa Bay, Washington, and Arizona, go back to the 28-team major leagues, and have a contraction draft. With the first pick the White Sox select Bradnon Webb.

Anyway, this is an evenly matched series. Everything I hear from the ‘experts’ is that about half are picking the D-Backs and half are picking the Rockies. Of course, Jesus is taking the Rockies in 6. I’m going to disagree with Jesus.

The Rockies are really hot right now, but the Diamondbacks have homefield advantage (even with the empty seats), a great bullpen and timely hitting. Those three things will outlast a hot streak every time. Also, as well as Jeff Francis and the rest of the Rockie rotation has been pitching, I think the Diamondbacks will put that to an end. I’m taking Arizona in 6.

So I suppose I’m picking Boston and Arizona. Ick.

as i get fully into baseball mode with the playoffs. i realize how much i love this game. even though my team is not in the postseason this year i still love watching every game. there are so many things about the game that i love but here are some of my favorite plays and the best baseball jargon rarely heard by broadcasters. they are listed here and i am gonna try and do one from A-Z. i have given the definitions not because i think you are as dumb as abc for making a show about some cavemen from an insurance commercial but for reference.

A

asprin: a fastball thats harder to hit than that hot chick wearing that tiny white dress and obviously minuscule piece of dental floss for underwear going up her nice bubble of an ass that the whole bar can see at happy hour. fuckin tease!

B

butcher boy: you wont see this much in the american league. its when the batter fakes the bunt only to pull back and take a quick swing trying to dump the pitch over the infield reacting to the bunt. usually only seen with a pitcher or a shitty hitter like jason kendall.

C

cornucopia: originally this was just texas rangers’ annoucer bill land making an ass of himself when he was calling an easily caught fly ball. what he meant to say was ‘can of corn’ like chicago white sox announcer hawk harrelson commonly says. it has since taken on a life of its own and means the same.

D

duck fart: a soft liner over the infielders head. much like how the feathers on donald duck’s ass would muffle or soften any wind passing by. it was changed by the ACLU to ‘duck snort’ in a class action law suit in the historic case of daisy duck vs. the s.b.d. also called a ‘hump back liner’

E

evil empire: the yankees - i know its not a good one but i need a reason to show this ridiculous picture of roger clemons and his shirt open looking like mr. buzzcut the p.e. teacher from beavis and butthead

F

five and dive: everyone reading this has one of these on their favorite team. its some weak ass pitcher that can only go five innings and that it. see also: kip wells. hell i take that back - that p.o.s. couldnt even make it that long without giving up 8 runs.

G

golden sombrero: 0-4 with four strike outs. kinda like a golden shower without that visit from r. kelly.

H

high cheese: you all know what this is - its just fun to say especially when you say it all nasally like high cheeeeezzzzeeee! think about vince vaughn in old school.

I

infield fly rule: yeah we have all heard of it but does it really exist? its kinda like a hot chick that cooks, cleans and swallows.

J

judy: a hitter that doesnt get much behind their hits. sally works fine or saying either ‘hit it with your purse’ or ‘his skirt got in the way’

K

keystone sack: its second base. like the keystone in the arch which is the piece that fits right in the middle or craig ‘keystone’ monroe.

L

LOOGY: Lefty One Out Guy - a left handed specialist usually used to get one or two batters out.

M

match sticks: successive innings where a 1 is put up on the board.

N

no room at the inn: bases are loaded and no where to put the player. kinda like the feeling joseph had when trying to get a place to stay in bethleham. oh yeah - i went there!!

O

olympic rings: 0-5 with 5 strike outs. i am going to hell for that last one arent i?

P

pearod: a hard shot back up the middle right at the pitcher. not that feeling you get after you got a little too crazy at your buddy’s bachelor party where it burns every time you piss and it looks like you have sideburns going up the sides of your johnson.

Q

room Q: that spot that thats reserved for me in hell for calling joseph a player where satan cuts out my eyelids, then feeds me a bottle of sleeping pills and forces me to watch the episode of Golden Girls where all the women are talking about their vajay vajays in graphic details and ends with the premiere of their golden girls gone wild video from mardi gras. do you want a gummer?

YOU CANT GO ANY FURTHER WITHOUT WATCHING THIS FIRST!!!!!!

R

ribeye: an RBI. its taken from saying it as a word. developed from ribby to ribeye and now is even called a steak.

S

shoot the cripple: said to a batter when the count is 3-0. it should be a really easy pitch to hit much like shooting…..oh fuck - now that is just wrong!!

T

tater: a homerun. theres nothing funny here. if you wanna laugh watch that golden girls video again and try not to puke.

U

uncle charlie: a curveball, usually a good 12-6 curve ball. it has nothing to do with what happened at your family reunion when your creepy uncle took you out back and told you if you didnt tell anyone about it you could finally sit at the adult table for dinner.

V

ive got nothing for this - i shouldnt have had that last beer.

W

wave: the most ridiculous and most worthless activity that can be done at a baseball game. its my nemesis and sworn enemy. if you are bored enough to do the wave. you can usually find it at wrigley during one of their 95-loss seasons. the only thing worse than the wave at a baseball game is sitting in the section where it begins. some fucking drunk douchebag screaming 1! 2! 3! then pointing to the crowd. I HATE YOU WAVE GUY!!!

X

does anything really start with x?

Y

yacker: a nasty curveball with a lot of break

Z

hell i dont know anything with a Z either - just for making it this far you get this:

Oh, what excitement. The 2007 postseason is upon us, and for the White Sox and Cardinal fans who write this site, it really couldn’t be better than to see the Cubs in the postseason. Outside of watching our teams battle for (another) title, the next best thing is to see how in the world the Cubs will choke this year.

Ah, I’m just playing, Cub fans. I won’t be cheering against you; in fact, I would love to actually see what would happen in this city if the Cubs won. Would the city implode? Mass orgies on Waveland? Dogs and cats living together? Who knows.

But will it happen? Can the Cubs overcome the hilariously exciting and ridiculous National League playoffs? Here’s a breakdown of the four first round series, complete with predictions that are sure to…….be not right. (Ha! I’m original!):

Cubs vs. Diamondbacks: It seems to me that this series could be decided by the end of Game 1. If the Cubbies can find a way to beat Brandon Webb, the D-Backs don’t have much of a chance to get back to Arizona for a chance to win the series in 5. They surely won’t win three in a row if they lose Game 1. After Webb, Doug Davis, Livan Hernandez and Micah Owings figure to face Ted Lilly, Rich Hill and Zambrano on the turn around. Those are ugly matchups for the D-Backs. I see Webb pulling off a close win in Game 1 over Zambrano, maybe a 2-1 type score. I then see the Cubs rattling off three straight, clinching the series in 4 with a weekend win at Wrigley, even if Arizona brings Webb back to start an elimination game. Cubs 3 games to 1.

Phillies vs. Rockies: Did you guys watch the Rockies-Padres game last night? Did you see the fat douchebag who had his little rat dog sitting on his lap behind home plate? How do you get a dog in the park? Why bring a dog? How does anyone who would bring a dog to a baseball game get seats in the first row behind the plate? It totally flabbergasted me throughout the game. Anyway, all signs point to the Phillies dominating this series. They can match the Rockies’ offensive output, and they have far superior starting pitching. The Rockies are the hottest team in baseball, but the Phils might be a close second. There is really nothing that shows me that the Phillies should lose more than one game in this series. That’s why I’m picking Colorado. What I saw last night was something I haven’t seen out of any other team in these playoffs, at least to this point: baseball magic. Down 2 runs in the 13th against Trevor Hoffman? Double, double, triple, walk, sac fly, we win. Wow. Look for Matt Holliday to show all casual fans that he is rightful winner of the 2007 NL MVP in a close race over the Phillies’ Jimmy Rollins. Rockies 3 games to 2.

Red Sox vs. Angels: As much as I like the idea that the Angels are playing ‘National League baseball’ in the American League, I just don’t see how they match up in any way with Boston. Unless John Lackey can beat Josh Beckett twice in this series, the Halos don’t stand a chance. Vlad Guerrero’s October collapses will continue, and the Red Sox will cruise to an easy sweep of Anaheim (not LA Angels of Anaheim, that shits dumb). Red Sox 3 games to none.

New York vs. Cleveland: As an AL Central guy, I thought in March that the Indians were the team to beat in the division, and they proved me right. But they did it a bit differently than I thought. While Travis Hafner didn’t have his usual scary offensive season, Fausto Carmona came out of nowhere and gave the Tribe an awesome 1-2 punch in the rotation. Meanwhile, while everyone decided the Yankees were done in June, I warned fellow fans that the Yankees do this shit every year: they suck for like 2 or 3 months, then Torre and the boys make the necessary roster adjustments, their lineup gets hot and they make the playoffs. Since I’ve been right about these teams all year, believe me when I say that the Indians will beat the Yankees. The Yankees are the sexier pick, and the media will hope and plead for a Red Sox-Yanks ALCS. But even the New York lineup won’t beat Carmona and Sabathia 3 times in 4 starts. Indians 3 games to 1.

So there it is. Cubs-Rockies and Red Sox-Indians. So be sure to look for Diamondbacks-Phillies and Angels-Yankees.

The New York Giants have the number one defense in the NFL.

Brian Griese is worse than Rex Grossman.

Willie Randolph needs to be fired.

The Arizona Diamondbacks will win the World Series and no one will know the names of any of the players except Eric Byrnes.

In 224 games Tony Romo will beat Brett Favre’s Touchdown record.

The St. Louis Rams will go 0 - 16

Every team in the NFL should platoon quarterbacks and win like the Arizona Cardinals.

Hope Solo will never play for Team USA again.

The Cleveland Browns have a top 10 offense in the NFL.

Half of the Top 10 teams in College Football are horrible.

Devin Hester will never have another ball kicked to him.

Donovan McNabb put on the cleats made out of cement before week 4.

Trent Edwards is the real deal.

Joey Harrington is playing like a Duck again and that’s a good thing.

• The Cubs will probably clinch their division this weekend. As a White Sox fan, this has been a pretty shitty year, but I still don’t wish any ill will towards the Cubs. Some of their fans do bother me, but as a whole, I think they should get to see their team win a title before they die. As a lifelong Chicagoan, it would be pretty cool to see what would happen around here if the Cubs won. I have a feeling it would be like when the Bears won the Super Bowl, multiplied by about 100. I think part of the reason it wouldn’t bother me as much is because of 2005. Its almost as if we, as Sox supporters, won the race. The Sox won the title first, and no matter what, nothing can take that away. But that doesn’t mean a possible title should be any less special for their fans; it just means a Cubs title before 2005 would be sickening to most Sox fans. Now, it would be fun to see. However, unlike last year’s Cardinals, I don’t see any way this Cubs team wins three playoff series and the championship.

I’ve never felt worse for a pro athlete than I do for Rex Grossman. He has been absolutely killed by fans and media. I wonder if he almost is glad he’s not the starter anymore. The best thing for him would be to sit on the sideline for the rest of the year, sign a free agent contract with someone next year, and start over with a clean slate. As a Rex backer, I had to admit while watching the Chiefs game that the time had come to make a move. Unfortunately, a quarterback change might not be enough to overcome a banged-up defense, pourous offensive line, and drop-happy receivers.

• I’ve been playing Madden 08 a lot lately. (Only about four people will relate to what I am about to write about, but I don’t care). When I play, I just play on franchise mode. For those who aren’t familiar, franchise mode is when you guide a team through season after season. Well, I have to play on the highest level, All-Madden. If I play on any other level, its way too easy. The problem is that the All-Madden level, in its efforts to make the game difficult, ruins all realism. For example, in 95 percent of the games you play against the computer, they make things happen to make the game close. I was playing the AFC Championship a week or so ago, and although I dominated the game thouroughly, I lost because the opposing team brought back 3 interceptions and 2 kicks for touchdowns. I lost 38-35. I mean, come on. A few days ago, I was playing the Rams and video Torry Holt caught a 5-yard pass over the middle, trucked 3 linebackers and